Back in July I wrote a post about being a clock watcher. Summer was winding down and I knew that the lazy days of summer were coming to an end much faster than I was ready for and it was soon going to be back to early mornings, set schedules, homework and earlier bedtimes. I knew that I was again going to be a clock watcher to make sure we were all where we needed to be, when we needed to be there. Summer freed us from being clock watchers but the start of school put us back in that role.
Here it is almost December and I am still very much in clock watcher mode (although I did escape it for 5 glorious days for Thanksgiving break!).
It recently occurred to me that not only am I a clock watcher but I am also now a Calendar Watcher.
I have closely watched the calendar as the days and months have gone by.
I can tell you that it is nearing a year ago that Tim had the diagnosis of cancer. I can tell you that it has been almost 11 months since his surgery.
I can tell you the date of his biopsy.
I can tell you the date of his surgery.
I can tell you the date his radiation began.
I can tell you the date he got his feeding tube put in and when he finished radiation.
I can tell you when he began to be able to work part time again and when he went back to full time.
I can also tell you now that Tim is nearing a milestone on the calendar -- the very calendar I have been watching. It has been almost a year since his diagnosis and 3 months since his last scan. That means that another scan is coming....tomorrow, in fact...December 1st.
So I have very much been a calendar watcher waiting for tomorrow to make an appearance.
Scan times are always riddled with anxiety as you wonder just what it will reveal. Will it show cancer successfully at bay or will it confess dreaded news? You just never know because the very nature of cancer is uncertainty.
But while uncertainty looms about some things, there are many other things that are certain and THAT is what we cling to. We cannot ever let uncertainty of things we don't know cloud our vision of the things we do know.
"This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it."