Friday, August 23, 2013

Dear Abigail and Annah

Dear Abigail and Annah, 
While putting some things away in your bathroom today I reflected on the things that I have apparently failed to teach my lovely daughters. Somehow I missed some very needed instruction so I just wanted to let you know a few things. 

First, it is perfectly okay with your mother -- actually, it is her ultimate desire -- that you throw out the dull razors, empty bottles of shampoo, body wash, spazzed out shower scrubbies, conditioner, and face wash. I really don't want to see you on an episode of "Hoarders" one day. 

Second, it would be equally pleasing to me to see you dispose of the multiple spent tubes of toothpaste laying in your bathroom drawer. I am betting that even if they were all combined there wouldn't be enough for even one more brush. Throw them out. I promise I have more. 

Third, what can I do to get you to stop using the q-tip container as an amplifier for your iPod? I could handle you using it like that IN the bathroom but it makes me twitch when I go looking and find it in your room everyday. Have we not taught you compassion for homeless q-tips? Apparently not. 

And finally, will someone fess up and tell me WHO all the toothbrushes belong to? Each time I ask I get the stupid look and total denial. Really? There are 4 people that live in this house. Your father and I keep our toothbrushes in our bathroom -- TWO toothbrushes -- one for me and one for him. You two have your own toothbrushes -- TWO of them -- upstairs in your bathroom. But somehow we have ended up with an additional FIVE TOOTHBRUSHES in the DOWNSTAIRS bathroom who are owner-less. That's NINE TOOTHBRUSHES for a family of 4. The truth will set you free, I promise. And we would all sleep better at night if you just come clean. 

Love, 
Mom


*This dog toothbrush holder is a treasure in our home. Abigail loved this when she was little and it continues to live in the downstairs bathroom -- FULL of toothbrushes that belong to no one. :)

3 comments:

Dotti said...

Loved this, just remember, my Mother always told me to keep a toothbrush handy for the kitchen sink, they are good for scrubbing around faucets, getting into little places that cloths and sponges won't, would also apply to bathroom for handy clean-ups too. Just saying..

Unknown said...

sooo funny, maybe you can use them as guest tooth brushes. I miss you guys!!

Montereymom said...

Oh how you made me smile with this message to your girls, your sense of humor has always impressed me. You should write a book, both you and Tim have always found the humor in everything, even when it was a "hard to take situation", what a blessing in your lives to be able to laugh at annoying things. I love you for this trait...and other things.